Colon Cancer Awareness Month

As you may or may not know March is Colon Cancer Awareness month and I want to take this chance to put my story on here and thought I would have done it already but  hopefully will soon.  For today I just wanted to mention that it makes me very happy to hear that my situation has encouraged someone else to get checked.  I hate all that I'm going through and it seems I'm going through it needlessly.  This cancer is one that can be easily prevented by getting checked.  While there are many commercials out there this month encouraging getting checked if you're over the age of 50 I totally disagree and think people should be checked earlier.  I was diagnosed at age 38 with no family history of any cancer.  If you are having any bowel problems I recommend seeing your doctor and possibly getting the colonoscopy.  Better to go through that inconvenience than to go through what I am now.

This also seems an appropriate time to mention a website someone else told me about.  It's called chemo angels and volunteers write and send emotional support to people undergoing chemotherapy.  I would love to be a volunteer but think maybe i should wait until my chemo's done as I'm unreliable right now.  You don't have to have had chemo to be a volunteer and you guys have been great to me so thought some of you might be interested in helping a stranger.  Anyway, here's the website if you're interested http://www.chemoangels.com/ 

I am having a lot of stomach cramping that is probably due to the new chemo but it's bareable.  I actually don't feel too bad, just need to rest a lot which is better than my last treatment.  I'm sure having the fluids helped because I did still have issues with drinking.  :(  I'm already dreading the next treatment, next Thursday just seems so soon.  I have to just take each day as it comes and believe me I am feeling like a real whiner here but I'll get through.  I am so hopeful that my life after chemo will be similar to my life prior to it.  I have so much I want to do and my body can't keep up with my mind right now.  It's so frustrating.  Even more so when I have so much I want to say but my mouth is too tired to talk and my fingers are too tired to type.  I just have to believe that this is the lowest and I'm handling it; it'll only get better.

While I am so happy to have reached the halfway point of chemo I sure wish I could be looking forward to the last treatmen next week.  I think when it comes to the last one I will embrace it and be SO gloriously happy.  I want it over.  I don't even really worry about it coming back; I must believe that I've done all I can to prevent that.  Odds are that with my diagnosis at my age it will come back but hopefully that won't be until I'm 80.

The amazing thing to me is that I felt so horrible during the chemo, same as always yet I was getting different drugs.  It made me wonder how much is in my mind.  I know there are people who get sick, throwing up, as they walk in for chemo so the mind does mess with us.  But for some reason I thought I could overcome the mind thing.  I KNOW what to expect and such and try to always go into with a positive attitude but it doesn't seem to work.  It's so depressing.  I want to feel good and fly through chemo just seems my body, or mind, won't let me.  Frustrating.

Britney and her boyfriend Nick are still here and while I haven't been up the entire time I've had some nice talks with Brit.  She will come and lay down with me and the three dogs and we will just talk.  I say three dogs because she brought her Nakita with her, Nakita is a boxer and because of her size I was worried about the visit but she's really been very good.  Dennis has had more work, cooking and cleaning up and such and I really look forward to the day I can take more of the load off him.  Nick seems like a nice guy and they seem to get along really well.  They take care of each other and that's good since they'll be going back to Pennsylvania this weekend.  I'm glad to know he'll look out for her.

Yesterday we traded the Scion.  Dennis has been wanting something 4 wheel drive for some time.  He had been researching and finally decided on the Rav4.  This made us able to keep the loan through Toyota and get into something more comforatble for just a few dollars more a month.  The Scion held it's trade-in value nicely.  When he started talking about trading I was worried we wouldn't be able to financially but this isn't going to hurt at all.  We got a silver one, it's pretty and comfy and all the seats recline so I can be comfy anywhere if we have to travel to Mayo again or whatever.  Also there's more room so I can resume taking the pups with us when I'm feeling good.  The poor little Scion just didn't have enough room for people, dogs and luggage.  They made the Rav4s bigger this year and you can even get third row seating.  Due to the experience with the Durango and third row seating was not even an option for us.  That third row is a joke.  Little kids only back there.  So anyway, we're happy with the Rav4 so far.  The fact it has 4 wheel drive is a definite good thing with our driveway.  We got 4-5 inches of snow Monday and Dennis had to have Mikal take him to the pharmacy to get my prescription because the car couldn't do the driveway.  :)   We're supposed to get 6 more inches tonight and tomorrow.

Whew, time for a rest.  Stay well and more soon.